Soon after the midsummer peaked,
A wonderful human being came out from and through me into this World. The third child I have given birth, a beautiful girl...

Her life story is not as long and intrigued as her siblings' adventures, but she brought me even more awareness about the incredible connections in the Universe and how we create the Reality from scratch every moment, adding to the big picture and blending each other's destinies.
 Same as her sister, she was to be welcome to our family home, in a cozy environment and a natural aproach. Thou this time home was not in the handmade hut in the deep wild forest, with me standing with my feet on the ground while the father had his daughter arriving directly in his hands, it happened in a lovely, peacefull and simple way, in water, among family vibes and hearing from outside the music of the ocean meeting the land...
It begins last summer, while we were living quite shanti life in a forest in Scandinavia, at first was supposed to be for a few days, but the situation turned out more complicated and we needed actually a few months...While living in that beautiful forest, after not having my period for 20 months ( it is normal if breastfeeding whenever the child desires to have lower levels of estrogen, though ovulation can happen anyway ), I had my first menstruation and calculating, it was 2 weeks after that I got pregnant. We did not planed neither one nor the other baby we have together, and we did not considered contraception either, for we like to allow the life to happen to us more than using our ego-will to determine ambitions or fulfill expectations...






Sharing to the father of my daughters the discovery of our new child growing in my tummy, we decided than to stay in the land of the aurora borealis for the winter and wait for her arrival. We found a wonderful island with peaceful vibes and impressive nature and there we got to live in a standard house, but with the forest around and the ocean at some 100 m.

 The funny detail was that in the bathroom there was this huge jacuzzi bathtub that we immediately considered the medium to welcome our baby to this world in a smooth way. We never used the jacuzzi during this time, for it is so big that would take the whole water tank to fill in and a big amount of electricity to get the bubbles, so it seemed like a waste of energy. But it was great to give birth in.
I had a normal pregnancy, some nausea in the first months, a flu sometime in december and healthy cravings... I have been eating organic food, mostly vegan ( I consume honey sometimes, bee friendly if possible and I indulged myself into testing some cake that had egg or butter in it, while visiting friends or family...)

I did not gain weight beyond the 5-6 kilos the pregnancy was, but the girl was about 3800 g and 53 cm long, so she got the  best of my diet and thrived on the real nutrients of the ecological products and in the absence of crazy chemical additives or processed foods.. While in spring and summer, we had a whole lot of wild plants from all around the house. Since it is in the countryside, the Taraxacum officinale are trully clean and powerful, so are the goutweed ( Aegopodium podagraria  ) or the birch and salix buds... After birth I had Achillea millefolium and Alchemilla vulgaris tea from outside the window for the uterus recovery and we burried the placenta on the rich ground that gave us so lovely greens to become its nutrient.

 We have also been eating an entire watermelon every day... shared in 4 equal pieces, for the kids love it! It is one of the few alqualine fruits, it tastes so nice, the sugar inside comes in the best form with the fibras and overall it cleans the body and keeps it hydrated :) The bananas, apples, pears, oranges we buy in the store are always organic so we make sure we get all the nutrients that fruit is supposed to deliver and dare to eat it with the skin, we all heard it's the most vitamins in the skin of the fruits, but if they are waxed or sprayed with pesticides, I would rather peal it off...

Giving birth to my third child was easyer and faster than my other deliveries. My son was born 10 years ago in the hospital and it was when I decided I will not give birth to another child in those circumstances only if I would have complications that would require medical intervention. It was intrusive, abusive and standard procedures all the way and as much happiness, magic and extasis I have felt for my first delivery, I remained traumatized by the doctor breaking my water and the insisting nurses to push on me sedative drugs which I had to deny several times to make myself clear. I was lucky the doctors were at a meeting and did not assisted me, so I have not been subjected to any more of their technical manouvres nor messing with my uterus postbirth as they generally do...

So I woke up at 6 and felt soft, but repetitive contractions, waited for a while and concluded there was a sequence of every 4 minutes. So me and my boyfriend went to the bathroom and started preparing. My daughter woke up meanwhile and she got the chance to watch cartoons very early in the morning (The Point, 1971). I broom the hall, the stairs and the bathroom while my boyfriend washed the bathtub. We burned incense and lighted a few candles. We wanted the welcoming in this world for the baby to be same smooth as her sister's most natural arrival, so no shocking electric lights nor intrusive approach were to be used. I walked outside on the wet morning grass, contemplated for a little while the rich life around me and prayed for strength from the Holly Mother of all nature. The contractions got stronger and I went in the bathtub. My 2 and a half years old daughter came down to the bathroom to visit me and wanted badly to join me in the bathtub, but had to give up to the promisse of a shower sometime later, for we did not knew how much warm water we would have needed. My son slept all along in his room at the upper floor. My daughter witnessed the entire event commenting ¨beibi comer ut¨...<3 It took about 3 hours, from which 1 hour of really strong contractions instead of 12 hours of labor as my previous births lasted, so I for sure recommend birthing in water.

So the contractions got very intense, but the warm water gave me an overall state of comfort and than suddenly my water broke. A few minutes later I felt the baby head finding its way out. One contraction with one push and she popped out her figure. I came up from the water to allow her lungs to receive air and in the second contraction with one more push came the rest of her body, spinning in a spiral out to my hands. She was perfect, beautiful and expressive, stretching her body in the big space with her eyes closed, peaceful in her uncertainty of where she was or what just happened and slowly adapting to the world outside the womb. She was offered breastmilk immediately after and she directly started to drink while I was waiting in the water for the placenta to come out. We kept her attached of the placenta for a couple of days and when the cord was dry and not pulsating anymore we separated her and waited for the cord to detach by itself.

Some ask me if it hurt. Of course if fuckin' hurt. It's like having 20 bones breaking in the same time, so they say...(me never broke any bone thou)
But that is only one side of the incredible experience of bringing a child to this world. The feeling while is inside of the tummy, growing and kicking everyday and than to see the baby outside and meet face to face... it's like her body materializes just than... and the pain is to be forgotten, such magic does the oxitocine hormone that we willingly get pregnant again and don't remain traumatised by the process of delivery... and the emotion of the connection of the breastfeeding... with the little being moving like a helpless bug, warm and breathing life touching from outside my body... Than, with time, children become grown-ups, and the memory of the mother's womb fades away. But this is how we come into this world, this is the way the life perpetuates, immortality of the human DNA is reassured and the beauty of social interaction is taken to the love connection level...

There is many ways of creating, we are creative individuals by nature and we do not necessarily need to mate in order to leave something behind us. There is not even need to prove our existence or make sure we are remembered, that is what I feel, I found no egoistic reason for me to make children, as much as I inquired myself in the subject... I don't even think I am making the world a better place by bringing in more humans, for in order to have a change in the mentality of the specie, it is the way of raising the youth that matters, not who or how many were made... If a child is inspired to be conscious and grow into awareness with his years passing, than we can have a more harmonious life here on this planet, but that can be done with the ones already here, I don't believe in genetic determination, but I am aware that we can somehow choose what genes we activate depending on the level of self awareness and also the environment/circumstances in which we develop ourselves.
 I know art is creation and all human expression, all culture is what we bring in and leave here, as building blocks of the Reality. All that is birth from us, in any way, is participation, contribution, connection with all there can be manifested, for we access the great source of intelligence when consciously behaving in a creative way. I, myself, enjoy many ways of expression. That I became a mother had nothing to do with any personal desires, my babies came to me because that was how things followed each other and lead to those events. All and each of the happenings in my life connected such that these humans arrived here in these times in certain places and in particular circumstances. I feel deeply grateful for the experiences of my life till now and I call the births of my 3 children the most delightful, intense and powerful things that I have lived, my highest trips and greatest emotional processes.

 I am not an activist pro-life and do not think everyone should make babies, I only share my experiences for whoever likes to understand this kind of stories and my message, naked of subjective details and most accurate I could put it... is about how everything in our lives connects and every step is one in a succession of moments that led to other moments, and to other steps and other directions and it generates the process of life itself... where we are and what we do in a particular situation is both a consequence and a trigger for another situation. I allowed myself to be surprised, it is not an abandon as a passive participant, for to be a participant is never passive, just by existing in this Reality is contributing to It, I do not cowardly put it on the master plan and I believe we are in power over ourselves, that is actually what I am trying to say... even not using the strong will to follow a path we choose and just intuitionaly walking in the direction our legs are taking us... every move we make is influencing the outcome of our journey, we can walk on the side of the road or look for shortcuts in the wilderness, but everything matters and all is in constant change. There is not a certain panorama on the way, and even reaching the same destination like everybody else, with each step we take we add one more detail in the background. Of course if me and my boyfriend did not came here to north to fix our daughter's paperwork, maybe the baby would not have existed... or if my son would not have been blocked at my parents' place during summer, we would have not left lovely Portugal and came to Scandinavia, maybe we would have just stayed there for long time without having to worry for her registered status and just waiting for the lawyer to fix it as was supposed to... and if I would not have come to Spain I would not have met the father of my girls... or if my son would not have went to visit his father I would not have travelled together with my boyfriend to northern europe and got pregnant with my first daughter on the way... and maybe if my family would not have opposed to my relation with my son's father, we would not have run away together and had him born... and all continues, and all has a reason, and if the things would not have been this way, than they would just have been another way... but definetly all connects and nothing is as random as it seems. I am here, now, because of all that happened to me and I am writing this blog thanks to what I have understood from all that I lived.

There is no separate, chaotic fragments of the Reality. It is no sense in each tango step if there is not the perspective of it as the dance...
It is Wholeness All Existence.